A Better You

The last couple of months have been extremely busy for my little family. We have celebrated more than a handful of birthdays, an engagement, and The Holidays. We were constantly busy with running around, preparing, planning and not getting much sleep in the meantime. We felt like we were always occupied and never had any rest time, never had any down time.

The worst part about being constantly on the run was not seeing my Mini as much as I’d like, or as much as I was used to (24/7).

At the beginning of my mom journey, I had so much guilt about leaving Mini behind and having time for myself, for my marriage, for my friendships. I had accepted that I was a mom, this was my new life and I had no right to complain or to take “time off”. Boy was I wrong. And the worst part about it; I wish someone smacked some sense into me earlier.

As many women, I had a routine before my daughter came along. I knew my work schedule, my date nights, my outings, my weekly girlfriend meets and simple me time. So once Mini came around, that routine completely changed, obviously, and I completely forgot whom I was.

I was so busy being “mom”, that I forgot to be me.

A little after Mini turned One, I got the courage to leave her overnight at my mom’s house. My husband and I had an event to attend and did not want to pick her up at 2 in the morning, so we figured she’d be better off snuggling with grandma and grandpa. Let me tell you, I was a paranoid wreck! I checked my phone at all times, sent follow up messaged to my parents, checked in constantly, made my husband check in, and was at the verge of going back to pick her up every couple of minutes. I was still breastfeeding as well, so my worry of my milk supply kept me anxious all night. I was a mess!

Now that I look back on it, I feel so silly. She was warm, she was fed and changed, she was being taken care of by two people that raised me and love her more than they love me probably. (jk-but really)

My mind set has changed quite a lot on this, as some of you have noticed. I have learned to remember and remind myself that on top of everything, I am mom first. But there are also other things that I am. I am a wife, a daughter, a sister- a friend. I am a person that enjoys alone time with my husband, I like to sit for hours with my girlfriends over coffee (or wine) and talk about nothing and everything, I like to walk around the mall for hours without distractions, I like to sit and write, I like to travel. So, I have accepted that wanting to do some of these things without my daughter is OK. I have accepted that there is nothing wrong with having a good time and not sharing it with her. I have my weekly outings with my husband, I have my weekly meets with my girlfriends and I have my weekly “me time”. I have established a new routine that I honestly enjoy more than my old one.

I personally believe that making time for yourself, for your marriage, for your friends, makes you a better mom, a better wife, a better friend. It makes you a better YOU.

With Love,

a mama + her mini